Some children struggle with things externally, acting out, getting in trouble at school or with the law, and disobeying their parents. Through these actions they often learn valuable life lessons. It’s not the best way to learn, and the experiences they face are often unforgiving and painful.
When families think about honor, they often restrict their thinking to respectful behavior, being polite, courteous, and having good manners. This is a rather narrow understanding and is only a small portion of what honor actually is.
During a discipline time, asking your children, "What did you do wrong?" can help them learn to take responsibility for their actions. Sometimes children don't even know what they did wrong. You may have to tell your child, but don't just say it and have your child agree, actually have the child repeat back to you what was wrong and take responsibility for it.
Some children have a hard time taking responsibility for their faults and weaknesses. A debriefing after a discipline time is always helpful. When your child is ready to go on with life take a few moments and talk about what happened.
We encourage parents to ask, "What did you do wrong?" This question helps get the conversation going. Ask in a gentle way, not accusing. This allows your child to admit what he or she did wrong. It's important for children to take responsibility for their actions. If others were involved, as they often are, a child should not excuse misbehavior by blaming someone else. The foolishness of others doesn't justify a wrong response.
- Patterns in Family Life
- Be a Coach to Your Children
- Teaching Tool: A Clear Warning
- "But My Anger is Justified"
- Learn to Recognize Emotional Signals
- Teaching Children Honor In The Bathroom
- Overcoming Selfishness With Honor
- What is Your Action Point?
- Compliance versus Obedience
- Understanding Obedience
- How a Child Can Be a Servant at Christmas
- Christmas Is The Time to Teach Generosity
- The Heart is a Wrestling Place
- The Gratitude Principle
- A Budding Leader
- Tasks, Problems, Conflict
- Parenting Insight For You To Use Now
- Sibling Conflict, Discipline Kids Separately
- Use Anger to Spark Creativity
- You Don’t Want to Raise a People Pleaser
- Make Mealtimes Fun
- Why a Bedtime is Important
- Teach Children to Take a Break
- Other Leaders and Authorities